♥Mori's Birth Story♥

Okay, back to work. Our big boss travels a lot during these days and so I have the time to finally document my birthing experience!

I'll start by saying that giving birth is 10% guts, 10% physical strength, 80% God's grace! Anything can truly happen in those hours and the saying that a mother's life is at stake everytime she gives birth is true!

It is by God's grace that I was able to stay working until my 39th week. Although I got a lot of "sermon" from old folks who told me I should be resting already. From the start I was determined to keep working until I can to maximize my leave days and my body agreed, even Mori was excellently in good health up to her last days in my tummy. (Of course, it will always depend on the kind of job you do and if your ob will allow you)

Exactly 3 days after my last day of work, I had my bloody show. December 1, 9:00 PM, while I was dancing to Justin Bieber's songs and doing the laundry! Haha I went to pee and was surprised to see blood! For the whole time I was pregnant, I never had any bloody discharge so that made me nervous and excited at the same time.

I called James who was at work and informed Suzie, my flatmate who was there with me that time. Unfortunately, James cannot just come home to bring me to the hospital because he was managing the store, so I had to wait til around 12AM for him to accompany me to the ER. (Disclaimer: Okay, I know from my nursing studies that a bloody show doesn't always means it' time, moreso I did not feel any contractions yet, but because it was my first time and my OB instructed me to go to the ER if I have any of these three things: pain, blood or water, I followed him. Explain pa?! HAHA)

On our way to the hospital I was waiting for the ouchy, labor pain I see in movies but nothing came. I was also grinning to myself because I prayed everyday and talked to Mori to please please please do not come out in November (the month just feels sad for me hehe) and come out December and she obeyed! Exactly the first of the month pa! Hehe

But we went home disappointed because the OB said my cervix is still half a cm open and it's not yet time.

Well...39 weeks pregnant and being sent home is like getting a really nice gift you are not allowed to open yet! Kainis! hehe

So we went home and slept. (or not really) I was half asleep for hours because I felt contractions every hour. Be careful what you wish for, they say, and indeed I got what I was thinking about---sharp labor pains that felt like my pelvic bones were crushing. It came and went away until lunch time. I was waiting for my water to break but nothing happened and so we didn't go back to the ER yet.

By morning of December 3, the pain intensified and I was sure I would have my baby anytime. Around 12PM, we were in the ER for the SECOND time and our mind was set that we will meet Mori in a couple of hours! I was too excited and nervous at the same time. I was praying and praying for the pain to go away and also for Mori to come quick and safe.

BUUTTTT, as soon as the doctor (who was a tall, hunky Arab male) checked me, he said it's still 1cm and I have to walk around more and come back after 2 hours or GO HOME. NO WAY I WOULD GO HOME AGAIN WITHOUT MY BABY!! That felt like a joke because the pain in my lower back was too much and I was almost struggling to walk! (hospital rule is not to admit any patient in the labor room unless the patient is 3cm dilated)

I didn't understand how my back pain was like that and still be 1cm dilated! I went back to the lobby where James and all the dads were waiting (middle east, so males are not allowed even in the ER)

I can remember James' face when he saw me walking out of the ER. He was like "Why are you still here??" LOL Some of the dads are already being sent home by the nursing aids to get their wife and baby's things. I sat with him in the lobby (hence, this photo) because I didn't want to go home again! I was praying for my cervix to open quick so we can see our baby. You can tell by the way I was clutching on to the chair that I was in great pain! I now understand the struggle mothers go through just to bring life! I hated everyone I saw, I hated all the noise I heard, I hated James for a while (because he can enjoy a donut while pep-talking me to being ready for the D-day and I felt nauseous even if I really wanted to eat, too)

After an hour of holding on to the lobby chair because of contractions, I told James I cannot handle the pain anymore and I would beg for them to take me in. I went back to the doctor who initially checked on me and asked if they can admit me now. The nurses were laughing at me because I was crying and they were like "Baby girl, you're 1cm dilated, relax, you still have to wait!" I begged the doctor to "PLEASE HELP ME :( :( :(" and finally, maybe he thought that I'm crazy and he needed to get rid of me so he asked me to lie down for he will "help" me dilate. Well, I don't know what he did but IT WAS CRAZY PAINFUL!!! and he then declared 3cm dilated so they prepped me for labor room!

I didn't expect a government-run hospital to have a labor and delivery room so clean and beautiful! (because it's definitely not how Philippine government hospitals look like!) I was expecting dirty beds and rusty machines and stinky hallways but I was taken to a room looking like a big suite room in the Philippines and had my personal nurse who watched over me the whole time. All of their services are free, but they don't allow anyone to come in with you so the sacrifice I had to make is to go through the hardest part of labor on my own (well, with the nurse at least).

I was expecting I can get relief as soon as I am inside, but they had to wait until I was 5cm to give me the epidural. The first hour I was in there was the MOST PAINFUL hour of my whole existence!! TRANSITION PHASE as they call it but I call it torture phase! I was crying, screaming "Give me epidural!!" and twisting all at the same time! I dreaded every minute I felt a contraction was coming, it felt like menstrual backaches times 1 MILLION!! My body was shaking uncontrollably, I felt like throwing up but nothing came out and at the latter part I felt like pushing, pushing somehow relieved the pain. But the nurse, a middle-aged Indian woman was already scolding me and telling me not to cry and push (apparently it makes the baby's head long, maybe that's why Mori had a small caput when she was born but it went away after 2 days) I felt frustrated because I knew all of this. I know what's good or not during labor, I've assisted so many deliveries during my nursing days, I've also told mothers to "calm down and conserve your energy" but now i TOTALLY understand that's total bullcrap LOL You cannot just tell a woman in labor to calm down. YOU CANNOT. HAHA

FINALLY, epidural came and after I had the shot, I was in cloud nine! I felt zero pain though I still feel the pressure when Mori moves while contractions happened. I was monitored every hour until I fell asleep. By 7m, I woke up and the nurse offered the room phone for me to call my husband. I talked to James for a little while until the doctors came in and told me I'm 7cm dilated. After a few minutes, I felt a pool of warm liquid and it was my bag of water. The nurse cleaned me up and by 9pm, I was fully dilated and the doctor told me by 12AM, I should be ready to push.

The doctor, a very nice middle-aged man, came to the room at !2AM, taught me how to push and after a couple of minutes, he asked me to push for real. After two long and strong pushes, they placed Mori on my chest. She came out at exactly 12:25 AM on the 4th of December and I swear, the moment she was placed on my breast was the happiest, sweetest, I-can't-explain-the-feeling moment of my life! She looked like a really white Chinese doll and cried like a cat. I asked the doctor if her fingers and toes are complete, and HOW WAS HER NOSE and everyone in the room laughed. I really wanted to know if he got James' good-looking nose! (well, when I saw her for the first time, I knew she didn't! HAHA I saw her nose and told myself, gosh, this is MY nose! WHYYYYY MORI WHYYYY! LOL)

After a few minutes, the nurse took her for bath and APGAR scoring. I had to stay for a while because the doctor said my blood pressure dropped, they brought Mori in to latch and wow, she was a good latcher from day one! A few drops of colostrum came out and she had it! They then gave me the phone to call James. It was around 2AM but he was still awake and waiting for my call. I told her Mori is finally here and he got too excited to visit the next day (visitors,even husbands,are only allowed from 3PM to 9PM) After an hour, they transferred me to the recovery room.

By 4am, I was transferred to my bed at the ward and Mori was endorsed to the ward nurse too. They held her for a while and after an hour, they gave her to me for feeding. She didn't really eat a lot and her eyes were wide open staring at me. Hehe Like what I've said, visitors were only allowed in the afternoon so the whole morning, it was just me and the nurse and one Indian woman, my wardmate, who looked after me, assisted me, and helped me with everything I needed and was like my "Ate" while the nurses were busy. I felt blessed that inspite of our language barriers and differences, God used her to comfort me and support me during my first hours postpartum.

In all fairness, all the nurses were really nice and took care of all the mothers well. Well, I think they should be because they are being paid good. I could understand if some of the nurses in the public hospitals in the PH are not always nice because of the salary they get, but here in Kuwait, government nurses can get as much as Php 200,000 a month, so yeah, they SHOULD be nice! :)

Afternoon came and Mori finally met her daddy. He cried and I cried too, seeing him so in love with our little dino.

Then Mori met her Lola and Lolo, aunts and our friends in the PH via video calls. It was such a happy moment introducing our baby girl to the people who love her and will be with her as she grows up.

He placed Mori in the bassinet and lied down just staring at her for hours!

All because of God's grace! Without Him I wouldn't be able to go through all the pain. All throughout my pregnancy, I held on to God's promise: Isaiah 43:2 When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you.

Being pregnant and giving birth in a foreign country with very minimal physical support system is HARD. It's not easy to be pregnant and alone, to wake up early, cook your food, do your laundry, keep the house clean. James deserves an award for being so patient and so loving, but he has a job too. So sometimes, when I felt like eating something, I have to get it myself, "craving mo, luto mo". :) So if you are reading this and you are pregnant living with your in-laws or with your own mom and family who takes care of all your needs, be thankful.

If it were just me and James, we would've given up and I would've went home to make things easier for me. But we were sure of God's provision--strength, patience, wisdom, finance and health. We held on to this: God's design for husband and wife and for families is to be together, not to be apart. So no matter how hard it was, we trusted God for the strength to make it through together. And no matter how much our families back home want to be with Mori today, we will continue to stay together here in Kuwait or anywhere God takes us three, because that's how families are supposed to be. ♥

By God's grace I was able to endure being in the ward alone taking care of Mori already and finally, because of God's grace, Mori and I were both safe and healthy and ready to go home by Day 2. She received her first dose of vaccines and was very healthy at 6.8 lbs ♥

My advice for soon-to-be moms? PRAY.

Praying will calm you down, make you feel you're not alone and telling God what you want for your baby is important. When I was pregnant, I prayed everyday for a quick, safe delivery and God answered my prayers. Mori came out without any major health issues and who would've thought I can push that strong?! Hehe

Giving birth is just the beginning, there's more to see and experience ahead, but now I am sure of this: whatever happens, I have my Moriah Francine, I will never be alone ♥♥♥